God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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