i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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