the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
