I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize