Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
