You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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