I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
