Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
