yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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