Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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