Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
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