So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
