He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
