My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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