haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Randomize
