rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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