he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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