put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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