her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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