Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize