She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
