You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
The adults are the big ones right?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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