how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
