: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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