Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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