Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize
