weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
