If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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