dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
