It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
