I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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