areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
