I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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