I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
