Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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