As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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