he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
