did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
