i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
