I cockslap morals
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
