worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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