I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
