its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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