absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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