Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
