dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Life is so much better after having sex.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
