Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
