all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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