the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
