you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
